• Loreal Hicolor Hilights for dark hair only 
• stage one of my eventual blondeness 
• my goal is to have hair like soo joo park 

1. Went on a wild goose chase for Revlon's legacy collection lipstick. I bought Icy Violet, Snow peach, and Jungle peach.
2. Watched The Grand Budapest Hotel
3. Preparing to bleach my whole head blonde
4. Felt like myself for the first time in a long time

How long and how often should I be sad about all the things that have and have not happened in my life?

Remember when I got drunk off mango margaritas and yelled and cried about a woman's lot in life in front of small children who will never know how good they have it? Little girls accompanied by their fathers who will never understand and never be able to help them figure everything out. And continuing to say with tears running down my face that I am strong and I am not a fragile flower but a nepenthes cup plant that is capable of digesting small frogs and mice, very clearly scaring the bejesus out of the father who is not ready for his little girl to grow up and become one of four very drunk girls at a Mexican restaurant.

My whole life is about "Remember Whens."

Remember when my first kiss was a result of a sexual assault?
Remember when I found out I was pregnant?
Remember when I made the hardest choice that any woman will ever have to make in her life?

Remember, remember, remember.

Baby it's cold outside

Last Week

I was thinking long and hard about how I never talk to people from high school one day and then seeing and talking to people from high school the next. So I guess I'm not as far removed from high school as I like to think. That's okay though because sometimes it's nice to hang out with people who are familiar. And it is the end of the summer when people are starting to go their separate ways again and are no longer bumming around, so it feels customary that I have my blast from the past before heading my way. Summer always feels like a different time where everything is easy.

summertime

after three hours 

It's nice to see the sun setting outside my window. Texas sunsets are really extraordinarily beautiful. I am so thankful for this day.